From A Whisper To A Scream

Mr. and Mrs. Dan Gauthier

The weekend started on Friday night with an air of optimism and excitement. That soon took a turn for the worst at around 11.30pm on Friday night. As we were driving on the highway heading towards Ulsan ,we recieved a phone call from a good friend of ours. He told us that he had just talked to his brother and that his brother informed him that their dad was dying. The doctors have gave their father a maximum of 6 months to live. He has stomach and liver cancer and is in pretty bad shape already. What do you say to your friend? How do you try to make him feel better? All these things went flying through my mind as we were driving along the highway. What am I going to say to him? My mind was in total chaos!

Eventually of course, my emotions settled down and I began to realize that there can be no plan or course of action when your friend needs you. All you can do is listen and let your friend bounce off of you. Our friend did not come out Friday night, but I met up with him on Saturday afternoon.

We talked about his dad a lot and I tried my best to be the best listener and friend that I could be. It was quite emotional and I had to hold back my tears on several occasions.

My friend is just so wound up that he doesn't know what to do. He was asking me about his job and what about the future and other things. I just told him that he had to go back and spend some time with his dad and brother and family.

To make matters worse he also doesn't have a valid passport as he had his stolen when he was in the Phillipines. The Consulate in Pusan is also shut until May 18th so he needs to come down to Seoul to get it. Just another problem that he has to deal with!

He will be fine if he comes down here as he can stay with Dave or I while he is getting things sorted. He seems to be handling things quite well and although it is an enormously difficult time, I know that he has the strength and courage to get throught this.

My friend has to sit down with his boss at the university and see what kind of time he can get off or try and work something out. If worst comes to worst, then he can just quit and find another job if he comes back. My friend even said to me today that he might just stay in Canada and go back to university and do his masters. I told him, why not!!!! Let things be, but do the right thing and go home as soon as you can.

This has really hit home with me, as my Mum and Dad are the same age, actually older than my friend's dad. It just made me think more about what I deem important in my life. I have always cherished my family and friends, but this event has brought home things more strongly than ever. We all get so caught up in life and become so selfish that we really do not give such important things enough of our attention. We need to stop a little and slow down. Family are the crux of our existence and we need to tell them we love them as often as we can, in our own ways. Even emails and phone calls are just as important as sending a birthday card or a gift. There are a hundred ways to show them that we love them, but we need to do it and not keep putting it off.

I have a wonderful relationship with my family, but often feel guilty about being away from them and not being able to drop round for a coffee or a 'chat.' My family understands, but it does not relieve the guilt that I feel sometimes. I think all of us that live away from our families, especially in other countries feel the same way?

Well, that was the start of the weekend, now for the wedding on Sunday afternoon. The wedding started around 11.30am and ended about 1.30pm. It was short and sweet, typically Korean style. It was a great wedding and I thoroughly enjoyed it. It was mostly Korean traditional style, but a little Western style mixed in, especially with the personalities involved.

There were photographers everywhere that were both taking pictures and filming the event. There were 2 screens either side of the altar showing different images. One was even showing photos of the bride and groom that had been taken in a studio. It was a beautiful big ballroom and the lighting was very bright.

There was also a big runway covered in white lace complete with an arch at the end of it. It led from the arch right up to the red carpet stairs that led up to the altar. The altar was also decorated in a nice white lace theme and a big huge wedding cake was stood beside it next to where the altar was.


A Buddhist monk married Dan and Minjong and it was a very nice ceremony. Dan's best man, Peter Cory and his wife Mira, helped keep the English speakers up to par with what was going on at certain times during the ceremony. At one point Dan had to wave his arms up and down three times and yell something in Korean that proved his loyalty to his wife. It was really funny to watch and a very unique experience.

The food was very good and there was a wide variety of different foods starting with salad and then sea-food, rice, vegetables, deli-meats and other concoctions that I have no idea what they were! Each table also was supplied with a couple of bottles of soju, beer and pop and of course water.

If you wanted more of anything, all you had to do was ask. It was a very well catered wedding and the serving staff did a great job. They cleaned each plate off your table as soon as you were done. Like I said previously, it was about 2 hours from start to finish, so things moved fast and efficiently.

Pictures were taken with the family of both the bride and groom. Dan's mother and father had arrived in Ulsan a week before the wedding along with his aunt, his mother's sister. Also Dan's daughter Jess was there. Jess actually works in Ulsan as an English teacher and has been in Korea about a year or so now. All of Dan's friends got a picture taken with him and Minjong also.

So, the wedding ended and I met up with my friend again. Kyoung Hee spent about 2 hours in a pc room while we we hung out. Then we met up with about 5 other friends of ours including Tony who finally had time to meet up with us after his morning 10km run. We ate at a bbq pork restaurant and at about 7pm, Dave, Kyoung Hee and I left from Ulsan for the drive back to Bundang.

We arrived back in Bundang at about 12.30. We stopped twice on the way back at the rest-stops. It was quite hazy in Seoul when we arrived; the yellow dust hit again. I watched the Tottenham vs Bolton game and then went to bed about 2.30am.

Woke up this morning feeling like I had been hit by a baseball bat. Spitting some lovely stuff out of my mouth all day and feeling very weak and giddy. I have decided to quit all drinking for the next 2 weeks until the FA Cup final. I am going to take a break from the gym today and hopefully start up again tomorrow.

I had a bit of a setback with my elbow about 2 days after going to the gym. It started locking up on me and really aching, so I decided that I need to take a longer break from weight-lifting again. I am going to go to phsyio tomorrow and go everyday this week.

Bad news about Wayne Rooney. He broke his foot again! Even when he gets over it, it will be too late for him to help England in any of their World Cup games. I think England's chance of wining the World Cup have dropped by about an easy 20 percent. Even Michael Owen will not be fit enough to make a difference to the team. Let's hope some inspiration comes from some other players that get to play up front, like Crouch or Defoe or whomever else Eriksson picks as forwards.

I came home from work on Monday night and literally 'crashed.' Watched about 10 mins of tv and didn't even go near the computer, which is very unusual for me nowadays! I slept, although as usual kept waking up every 2 to 3 hours, until 12.30 Tuesday afternoon. I am on the pc now to finish this post as I don't have any breaks in work today. 4 one hour and 20 minute classes with a 5 minute break in between each one, plus 60 essays to mark starting today. Oh well, it keeps me busy and the time does fly. I am off to work now.

The weather has turned very hot and it is sure going to be a hot summer. I love the summer so I am not complaining. I have a/c in the apartment, so sleeping will be no problem. I need to sweat a few excess pounds off this beluga frame now anyway.